Brad Pitt: Just. Stop. Please.
SOME PEOPLE SOUND SMARTER WHEN THEY KEEP THEIR MOUTHS SHUT…
Man, what a great line came out of the pie-hole of Brad Pitt. He won’t marry Angelina Jolie until “everyone in America who wants to be married is legally able…” Boo hoo hoo and blah, blah, blah. Brad, kid, dude, you are my hero! Remind me to use that line on the next totally-10 hottie I leave my wife for. (Wink, wink). But seriously, what a NOBLE and freaking HUUUUUGE sacrifice you are making. Everyone should be so strong. Let’s review:
· You and the total hottie are a couple who share a child, just like a normal married couple. OK. Got it.
· You and the total hottie sleep together (schedules and MULTI-MILLION DOLLAR film pay-days permitting, I assume) just like a married couple (sans million dollar pay day, of course). Got it.
· You live in the same house (oops, I mean MULTI-MILLION DOLLAR ESTATE) with said hottie (schedules permitting) just like a normal married couple (sans million dollar estate, of course). Got it.
· She’s a total babe who, for the time being, digs your vibe and you dig hers, just like a normal married couple. Got it.
· You share responsibilities together, eat together, raise the kid(s) together, shop, play, pay bills and do everything together, just like normal married couples do. Got it.
Wait, where was I? Oh yeah, remind me again why you won’t get married? Man, just stop. OK? Let someone else write your lines for you, that’s what they get paid for. They write the words and you say what they write. Right? It’s better that way. I mean, c’mon? Am I the only one who was in hysterics when I heard this? It is HILARIOUS!! On second thought, Brad, please, keep talking.
Man, that is some funny shit.
